Viet Graves

The Vietnamese attach great importance to two traditional family obligations - to care for their parents in their old age and to mourn them in death. These duties are felt so strongly, they are considered sacred. The traditional time of mourning for parents is three years. When death is about to take place, the entire family assembles around the dying relative, in silence. The eldest son or daughter bends close to record the last words of advice or counsel. At this time, the eldest child suggests a name for the dying person for it is considered unfortunate to continue the same name used in life after the relative has died.

The corpse is bathed to symbolize washing off the dust of the terrestrial world; hair is combed and nails clipped. Money, gold and rice are placed in the mouth of the dead to indicate that the deceased has left this world without want or hunger. The money is not real money, but copies of American $100 notes and these can be purchased in the markets. The corpse is then wrapped in white cloth and placed in a coffin. Members of the family form a honor guard around the clock until a propitious time for burial is selected.

Recently, however, the severity of the mourning period has been abolished to a large extent and descendants return to work soon after the funeral. Clothing for the mourning period has been modified to only a piece of black cloth worn around the arm, lapel or the head. Wedding ceremonies during the mourning period are still banned, but if the families have already approved of the engagement, special dispensation may be obtained through the proper rural or urban authorities. 

The body of  a Viet person is buried in a wooden coffin in a public cemetery for 3 years, after which the family dig up the remains and bury it in a ceramic coffin in their chosen ground, which is generally their own farmland. We were intrigued to see the graves along the river’s edge at near water level, which rather begs the question of how they were dug, without constantly filling up with water and why they don’t sink due to their weight!